Jim Cavanaugh is a shy suburban New Jersey teenager. His mom left when he was a child and his father is an ass. The unrelenting psychotic domination of his redneck dad forces Jim to search out his long lost mother. His quest takes him to the backwoods of Jersey where he encounters semi-retarded hillbillies who have a taste for DIY circumcisions and Peterbilt trucks. Nobody escapes the bloodletting in this heartwarming tale of a family reunited. Sure to be a holiday classic. Written by Mr. Pickles

Violet and her two cohorts attempt to help their "less-fortunate" students at Seven Oaks College - primarily by running a Suicide Prevention Centre and offering their off-beat advice whenever they get a chance. Violet's newest rescue is transfer student, Lily, and Violet wants to teach her how to talk and dress properly, and how to select appropriate men to be interested in. Along their way in helping everybody at the college, the damsels teach the fraternity doofi to hit the books, they get their hearts broken, but then attempt to start an international dance craze. Written by napierslogs